Chaborkia.com

Today I asked the bf whether he would feel that something went wrong if I abandoned my love for colorful and vibrant clothing with lots and lots of prints and detail, and wear dull and boring tones. After considering deeply, he nodded vigorously.

I smiled at his response.

Right now, I’m painting my nails in a crazy shade of scarlet that is so bright, it’s eye-watering.

I wonder how the bf will respond tomorrow when he sees me LOL.

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After reading through the tenancy agreement of my NZ campus, I was delighted to find that the supermarket is just 5 minutes walk away. I was literally jumping in joy - I loved wholesome and homemade meals and pretty much enjoyed cooking. The fact that I could save more by cooking was an added bonus.

I informed the bf about this and he was jumping in glee for an altogether different reason.

I asked him what made him so excited and he said,

I feel so happy that I can hold your hand and go shopping for ABC soup ingredients. Then go back boil soup and eat together!

Aaaaaaw, that cute guy, melted me on the spot totally. Happiness in it’s simplest and purest form. <3

Your call is important to us. You will be served shortly.

Like, if my call is so goddamn important, serve me right now already okay?!

Now I know why I seldom update. I am always dissatisfied with my blog post attempts, because they’re usually meaningless, crisp and concise one-liners that I divert to Facebook instead.

Sei loh this blog must not die. Must… Write… Longer articles. Just because I’m so long-winded. Haha.

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And inspiration struck. Yay!

It’s also regarding customer service.

My brother has been complaining that his office chair’s (those fancy healthy chair with ergonomic designs) seat cushion has been worn down and he needs it to be replaced.

I called and told the chair company’s girl my problem.

The customer doesn’t feel comfortable with the seat. Used for several years so worn down liao. I would like to order a new one. We’re willing to pay.

And she proceeded to list down a long-ass list of stuff over the phone to handle the situation. Procedures, kononnya.

1. She must call the technician.

2. She needs the technician to bring the chair back to factory for inspection.
Inspect what? I just want a new seat!

3. After inspection, write report about chair’s fault.
What fault? I. Just. Want. A. Fucking. New. Seat.

4. After approval, then proceed to repair broken part.
Problem is, the seat is not fucking broken. It’s just worn down. Imagine a fat ass sleep on the same mattress for 10 years. Surely the mattress will have an imprint of the person coz so heavy and mattress so old liao. Same thing with the seat lah, except my bro is not a fat ass.

EXCUSE ME,

I said the cushion doesn’t feel comfortable anymore, and we just want the goddamn cushion seat to be replaced with a new one. What masuk kilang, what report? If you really want to report, call in forensic scientists to calculate the ergonomics of the seat and check which E=MC2 is making the customer not comfortable lah. Stupid -race removed- girl.

What’s more infuriating is she totally warped my words on telephone in her writing on the Service Report,

Chair is faulty, please check and repair.

OEI SINCE WHEN I SAY FAULTY? The only thing faulty is your rusty brain! And possible ears clogged up with shit to listen properly.

Very hard to understand meh?

Bolehland’s customer service really boleh to the max!

Oh no, yet another 9 to 5 week! *Moans* And my bro smacked me. LOL.

I just came back from a weekend getaway with Akonana and family. Still can feel the lingering effects of salty sea water on mai face because I noticed that the salt content dried up mah pimples.

This is the exact view that took my breath away when I checked out the website.

And I was a happy fool, easily satisfied and infatuated with the scene. Believe it or not, I’ve never went on a beach holiday. It’s not because I don’t enjoy the sun, sand and water. It’s because mom had a terrible jellyfish encounter when she was younger and she doesn’t really like any one of us heading to this type of place.

I was expecting something that was on par with the likes of Redang or Perhentian. Sadly, it’s way below average.

The ugly truth?

Fact is, it’s yet another chop you kao-kao resort with a terrible buffet spread, limited supply of facilities and way too overcrowded with kids (read: monkey / monsters) raiding the pool and disrupting the lives of other patrons, right behind the backs of their unsuspecting parents.

Sea was a miserable murky combination of mud and debris. Didn’t even bother with the mandatory beach shot. So grey and miserable you’ll leave my website without the LOL factor.

Failed jump shot.

But I did LOL during the trip because I had great company by my side. I finally got to spend Akonana’s birthday with him after nearly 3 years of being in love with him. Previous years, we were separated by factors such as distance (goddamn old house was in Cyberjaya *#@#&$%&^) and work commitments. But I no complain also. See I’m such a good gf.

Relationship PRO-Tip: The ever raging battle between the sexes. Just maintain your balance and you’ll do fine.

If you are those gals who complain about your bf not being able to accompany you on every damn holiday (Valentines, relationship anniversary, your birthday, his birthday, your MAFA birthday, your dog’s birthday, some anniversary unknown to humankind), well screw yourself. Get your priorities straight. You do know some things are more important than celebrating all these if your partner’s time is constrained, right? And guys should do their bit by putting in some effort in remembering all this also lah.

But being a chaborkia, I DO enjoy my fair share of birthday celebrations and the occasional surprises. *Cough nudge* Something which I don’t get with a plank for a bf. Sigh.

The bf reliving memories of his childhood.

And here’s a recap of this place for ya all.

Swiss-Garden Golf Resort & Spa Damai Laut

Shouldn’t be hard to miss with all those signboards leading to it.

If you all have quality taste for beaches, please steer clear of this resort. Shoo, go to Redang or Perhentian or something. This place is for families with several attention-seeking monster kids to trample upon Mother Nature.

Please head to Akonana.blogspot.com to see uber awesome PP’d photos. ;)

Can someone explain this shit? LOL.

I feel obliged to say something even though I am suffering from a terrible bout of writer’s block.

My office was broken into last Saturday. I received the call from my sister-in-law when I was in the cinema drooling over my favourite vampire. Much to my dismay, I was eager to glue my eyes on the screen for more Edward (and Jacob’s abs), but to add insult to injury, Maxis had to butt in with bad reception so I was irritated longer and to even greater heights.

Annoyances aside, I had a rude shock when I received the news.

First thing that came into my mind was my brother’s workstation. If that was gone… There goes our livelihood and my poor brother’s sanity and hard work.

Fortunately (or unfortunately), now everything say cash one. The only fucking thing stolen was our petty cash stash. The fucker didn’t even take the syilings lying in my petty cash tong!

All our cupboards were opened and ransacked, and documents strewn all over the floor. Office hardware are all intact, much to our relief. There was this old laptop lying on the chair, just beckoning to be stolen, but he didn’t.

Cash, they needs it. Cold, hard, fucking cash.

And it’s time to find out who did it. CSI time! A sergeant and his PROFESSIONAL CSI crew came over to inspect the damage done.

Wow, CSI guy wor, I was sorta curious what he had to offer. I didn’t expect much…

And I was right to NOT expect much.

The only thing the bugger did was to spread some miserable carbon powder on one particular document storage unit we had. ONE OKAY?! OUR WHOLE GODDAMN OFFICE WAS TURNED UPSIDE DOWN IN SEARCH OF CASH. *Which we don’t have coz no marnee mah sob sob* And you check one cabinet nia!

Hello, there are tons of other surfaces that the culprit touched lah encik CSI.

CSI kononnya.

They say they can’t do anything because the fingerprints are not ‘whole’ enough, and proceeded to talk to us about how many juta-juta rakyat Bolehland houses and how hard it will be to trace the culprit. Not inclusive of foreigner somemore leh he added.

Fuck that lah. If I see the sincerity of them checking out the scene, trying to find out more about the issue, my writer’s block would still be intact and I’d still have a reason to leave this blog dormant. Nothing to complain mah. So distinctively Malaysian. *Cough*

And I end my angry article with a Malaysia BOLEH!!!!!!1

Kthxbai.